Wednesday, October 13, 2004

Throwing out the Bayliss with the bathwater

Australian Troy Bayliss has been dumped by MotoGP team Ducati for the 2005 season. Nearing the end of a disappointing second season in MotoGP, Bayliss was told by Ducati at last weekend's Malaysian Grand Prix that he would not be asked back.

Ahhh motorsport team management... Is there a sport where the player gets blamed more? In European/English soccer if the team goes badly, the coach goes. Same in AFL, rugby and almost every other sport. But in motorsport, and especially MotoGP, it's the poor bastard rider.Troy Bayliss

Last year Australian Kawasaki MotoGP riders Gary McCoy and Andrew Pitt paid the price for Kawasaki's god awful and (according to Alan Cathcart) dangerous shitbox of a bike. Team Manager Harald Eckl, who wouldn't seemingly know how to get his own way like with the Japanese bosses, in stark contrast to Australian Jerry Burgess (Doohan and Rossi at Honda and now Yamaha with Rossi) who has always stood up and TOLD the bosses what is required for victory and then WON.

Andrew Pitt. Might be thumbs up, buit I suspect I know what he'd like to flip Harald Eckl...I'm still filthy about how Andrew Pitt got cut when he had been told he was a "required player". Eckl got in fellow German Alex Hoffman who has made a fool of himself on a worldwide stage- hey if his team mate Shinya Makano can get on the front row of the grid and get a podium, then what the fuck is Alex doing down with the R1 road bike derived WCM's? Fuckin' joke.

And this year, it's Troy Bayliss to get the arse for a poor performance on a pig-Troy Bayliss. And they actually CUT him from the team when he can smoke 'em up like this!bike. Ducati have seen in all their wisdom to belt Troy. Hey, why not- he's not European like his team mate Capirossi, so no harm done and Marlboro get their sacrificial lamb. I say enough people have been sacrificed by Marlboro cigarettes over the years...

So I am calling for heads to roll inside Ducati. Start with Corrado Cecchinelli - Technical Director. He has been unable to produce a competative machine- for either rider. The constant changes from twin pulse to four pulse and back has left them with so little usable data that they look more like the Proton KR team than the once proud Ducati Corse team. Others should face the chop, but they won't.

In short - it's a fucking disgrace and I will be making a few choice signs to hold up at Phillip island*.

In 2003 Australia had three riders in MotoGP(Pitt, McCoy, Bayliss). In 2004 Troy Bayliss was th only full timer with cameos from Pitt and McCoy.

Next year...?

* I have no idea yet what this will entail. rest assured it will be biting, funny and ironic as hell.

SMH: Ducati cast Bayliss into wilderness
posted by thr at 2:40 pm 0 comments links to this post

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

...and Justice For All

Yet another letter to the papers. See articles at bottom for background.
A tale of two countries and of justice gone mad.

An American alcoholic kills a fellow American on The Great Ocean road while drunk. His defence counsel asks for a non custodial term because "jail in a foreign country would be harder for his client." This seems to ignore that he killed someone. Not deliberate, but killed nonetheless.

David Hicks has been in a jail cell for much of the day for several years without charge and certainly without consideration of how hard jail in a foreign country would be for him. Now charges have been brought and they do not include killing an American (or any other person for that matter), yet he may face more years in this inhuman place whether found guilty or not.

The Age: Drunk, jet-lagged driver killed tourist

The Age: Not guilty, sir, declares David Hicks
The Age - Editorial- The charges against David Hicks
Herald Sun: Andrew Bolt
posted by thr at 4:00 pm 0 comments links to this post

Street drags claim more lives

Two more dead after street racing. This time in St Kilda. No suprises, but ignorant views from people who know a bit about cars and accidents but fuck all about youth culture prompted me to write this letter to The Age. See the article link for what happened and for the comment by Terry House.

Terry House of the of the Teenagers Road Accident Group [The Age 6/10] says that passengers should speak out when they are in a car with a dangerous driver.

The culture of the "Chapel st cruze" set does not include this sort of responsible beahviour. One must understand that the passengers are more often the reason the driver goes too far- be it showing off to mates or indeed reacting to encouragement.

Predictably, after an accident involving young drivers and their passengers, society points the blame at the drivers and heaven help the driver that lives when the passengers die. It is my belief that the blame should be shared when the same mindset is shared by all in the car. One nights passenger is the next nights driver.

Yes it is sad when these young fellas die. But to hang the driver is to assume the others were forced at gunpoint into the car. Hey you buy a ticket you take the ride.

If it wasn't dangerous, if there wasn't a chance they could die, they wouldn't do it.
The Age: St Kilda speed strip claims two young lives
posted by thr at 3:26 pm 0 comments links to this post

Tuesday, October 05, 2004

Knifey, you fuckin.... idiot

So much effort for a small issue.

But hell, good for him!

ACDC lane has opened here in M-Town. Well not so much opened, but has been renamed. But Knifeyard, long time Melbourne music about town guy decided that the sign did not have the requisite lightning bolt like ACDC should have...


See also his page at:
Knifey's Blog
posted by thr at 3:49 pm 0 comments links to this post

Monday, October 04, 2004

I'm sure there's a logical explanation. I just don't have it..

AN adult sex toy shut down a key regional airport for almost an hour today when it was mistaken for a bomb, Queensland police said.

The vibrating object was discovered at Mackay Airport by a security officer who noticed the suspicious package inside a rubbish bin at the terminal cafeteria at 9.15am (AEST), a police spokeswoman said.

Cafeteria manager Lynne Bryant said her staff had been cleaning tables when they noticed a strange humming noise coming from the rubbish bin.

"It was rather disconcerting when the rubbish bin started humming furiously," she said.

"We called security and next minute everybody was being evacuated while they checked it out."

...she said in retrospect the humming sounded exactly like a vibrator – but it was better to be safe then sorry.

"You can't afford to take chances," Ms Bryant said.

Pardon me? in retrospect the humming sounded exactly like a vibrator I'm sorry, but just how does a vibrator sound in a bin? Like a frog in a sock? Like a duck farting in long grass? huh?

Of course, well all know from Fight Club that vibrating luggage is a no no:

JACK (V.O.) How I came to live with Tyler is: airlines have this policy about vibrating luggage.


Utterly empty of baggage. No people except for Jack and a SECURITY TASK FORCE MAN. The Security TFM, smirking, holds a receiver to his ear from an official phone on the wall.

Throwers don't worry about ticking. Modern bombs don't tick.

Excuse me? "Throwers?"

Baggage handlers. But when a suitcase vibrates, the throwers have to call the police.

My suitcase was vibrating?

Nine time out of ten, it's an electric razor. But, every once in a while ...
(whispers) ...it's a dildo. It's airline policy not to imply ownership in the event of a dildo. We use the indefinite article: "A dildo." Never "Your dildo."

Herald Sun- But it's not my bag baby!!
posted by thr at 4:08 pm 0 comments links to this post

Oh no you bloody don't!

The Age had the following story that left me HORRIFIED!
Motorcycle racing world champion Valentino Rossi has been linked to formula one icon Ferrari amid talk that teams will have to field three cars each next year.Click for fullsize

Ferrari president Luca di Montezemolo believes that Rossi, who is on his way to a fourth straight MotoGP world title, could team well with Michael Schumacher and Rubens Barrichello.

Talk about desperate! F1 is soooo damn boring that they have to look to other sports (as MotoGp essentially is) for personalities. Expect to see Dennis Rodman, Jason Akermanis, Barry Bonds, David Beckham and Brian Lara all try out soon!

Essentially F1's problems are:
  • Drivers have no personality.
  • The racing is too expensive.
  • Technology has killed "racing".
  • The owners have no idea how to make it interesting.

  • There is more passing and excitement in a lap of 125 GP racing than a year of F1. Seriously. To win in F1 you have to pit at a time that gives you clear track ahead, then lap consistently well until the next pit, at which time you might find yourself in the lead. Whopee do.

    If they want to make F1 intersting, here's thomasr's guide:
  • No pit stops for fuel. Shorten the race, increase the fuel loads so that its racing from go to whoa. If this isn't enough racing, then have two races per roud like in World Superbike Racing.
  • Financial cap akin to a salary cap in some sports.
  • Ditch Monaco. Nice place, shithouse race.
  • Include qualifying in the points for the round
  • Remove all electronic controls- in fact have regulated ECM and no other electronics permitted. No drive by wire, ABS, torque guages etc. As Jerry Burgess might say- put the throttle control at the drivers FOOT!

    Personally I see F1 just becoming a sport like horse racing,. An event, but not really for those intersted in cars. Motorcycle racing will continue to grow amongst officianados, but not the general public. Good. We don't need or want the ignorant fools that go to F1 if you ask me!

    The Age- Rossi to F1?
    • posted by thr at 3:12 pm 0 comments links to this post